《1 twilight暮色》第21章


my appetite — I bought nothing but a bottle of lemonade。 I just wanted to 
go sit down and sulk。 
〃Edward Cullen is staring at you again;〃 Jessica said; finally breaking 
through my abstraction with his name。 〃I wonder why he"s sitting alone 
today。〃 
My head snapped up。 I followed her gaze to see Edward; smiling crookedly; 
staring at me from an empty table across the cafeteria from where he 
usually sat。 Once he"d caught my eye; he raised one hand and motioned 
with his index finger for me to join him。 As I stared in disbelief; he 
winked。 
〃Does he mean you?〃 Jessica asked with insulting astonishment in her 
voice。 
〃Maybe he needs help with his Biology homework;〃 I muttered for her 
benefit。 〃Um; I"d better go see what he wants。〃 
I could feel her staring after me as I walked away。 
When I reached his table; I stood behind the chair across from him; 
unsure。 
〃Why don"t you sit with me today?〃 he asked; smiling。 
I sat down automatically; watching him with caution。 He was still 
smiling。 It was hard to believe that someone so beautiful could be real。 
I was afraid that he might disappear in a sudden puff of smoke; and I 
would wake up。 
He seemed to be waiting for me to say something。 
〃This is different;〃 I finally managed。 
〃Well…〃 He paused; and then the rest of the words followed in a rush。 〃I 
decided as long as I was going to hell; I might as well do it thoroughly。〃 
I waited for him to say something that made sense。 The seconds ticked by。 
〃You know I don"t have any idea what you mean;〃 I eventually pointed out。 
〃I know。〃 He smiled again; and then he changed the subject。 〃I think your 
friends are angry with me for stealing you。〃 
〃They"ll survive。〃 I could feel their stares boring into my back。 
〃I may not give you back; though;〃 he said with a wicked glint in his 
eyes。 
I gulped。 
He laughed。 〃You look worried。〃 
〃No;〃 I said; but; ridiculously; my voice broke。 〃Surprised; actually… 
what brought all this on?〃 
〃I told you — I got tired of trying to stay away from you。 So I"m giving 
up。〃 He was still smiling; but his ocher eyes were serious。 
〃Giving up?〃 I repeated in confusion。 
〃Yes — giving up trying to be good。 I"m just going to do what I want now; 
and let the chips fall where they may。〃 His smile faded as he explained; 
and a hard edge crept into his voice。 
〃You lost me again。〃 
The breathtaking crooked smile reappeared。 
〃I always say too much when I"m talking to you — that"s one of the 
problems。〃 
〃Don"t worry — I don"t understand any of it;〃 I said wryly。 
〃I"m counting on that。〃 
〃So; in plain English; are we friends now?〃 
〃Friends…〃 he mused; dubious。 
〃Or not;〃 I muttered。 
He grinned。 〃Well; we can try; I suppose。 But I"m warning you now that 
I"m not a good friend for you。〃 Behind his smile; the warning was real。 
〃You say that a lot;〃 I noted; trying to ignore the sudden trembling in 
my stomach and keep my voice even。 
〃Yes; because you"re not listening to me。 I"m still waiting for you to 
believe it。 If you"re smart; you"ll avoid me。〃 
〃I think you"ve made your opinion on the subject of my intellect clear; 
too。〃 My eyes narrowed。 
He smiled apologetically。 
〃So; as long as I"m being… not smart; we"ll try to be friends?〃 I 
struggled to sum up the confusing exchange。 
〃That sounds about right。〃 
I looked down at my hands wrapped around the lemonade bottle; not sure 
what to do now。 
〃What are you thinking?〃 he asked curiously。 
I looked up into his deep gold eyes; became befuddled; and; as usual; 
blurted out the truth。 
〃I"m trying to figure out what you are。〃 
His jaw tightened; but he kept his smile in place with some effort。 
〃Are you having any luck with that?〃 he asked in an offhand tone。 
〃Not too much;〃 I admitted。 
He chuckled。 〃What are your theories?〃 
I blushed。 I had been vacillating during the last month between Bruce 
Wayne and Peter Parker。 There was no way I was going to own up to that。 
〃Won"t you tell me?〃 he asked; tilting his head to one side with a 
shockingly tempting smile。 
I shook my head。 〃Too embarrassing。〃 
〃That"s really frustrating; you know;〃 he plained。 
〃No;〃 I disagreed quickly; my eyes narrowing; 〃I can"t imagine why that 
would be frustrating at all — just because someone refuses to tell you 
what they"re thinking; even if all the while they"re making cryptic 
little remarks specifically designed to keep you up at night wondering 
what they could possibly mean… now; why would that be frustrating?〃 
He grimaced。 
〃Or better;〃 I continued; the pentup annoyance flowing freely now; 〃say 
that person also did a wide range of bizarre things — from saving your 
life under impossible circumstances one day to treating you like a pariah 
the next; and he never explained any of that; either; even after he 
promised。 That; also; would be very nonfrustrating。〃 
〃You"ve got a bit of a temper; don"t you?〃 
〃I don"t like double standards。〃 
We stared at each other; unsmiling。 
He glanced over my shoulder; and then; unexpectedly; he snickered。 
〃What?〃 
〃Your boyfriend seems to think I"m being unpleasant to you — he"s 
debating whether or not to e break up our fight。〃 He snickered again。 
〃I don"t know who you"re talking about;〃 I said frostily。 〃But I"m sure 
you"re wrong; anyway。〃 
〃I"m not。 I told you; most people are easy to read。〃 
〃Except me; of course。〃 
〃Yes。 Except for you。〃 His mood shifted suddenly; his eyes turned 
brooding。 〃I wonder why that is。〃 
I had to look away from the intensity of his stare。 I concentrated on 
unscrewing the lid of my lemonade。 I took a swig; staring at the table 
without seeing it。 
〃Aren"t you hungry?〃 he asked; distracted。 
〃No。〃 I didn"t feel like mentioning that my stomach was already full — of 
butterflies。 〃You?〃 I looked at the empty table in front of him。 
〃No; I"m not hungry。〃 I didn"t understand his expression — it looked like 
he was enjoying some private joke。 
〃Can you do me a favor?〃 I asked after a second of hesitation。 
He was suddenly wary。 〃That depen
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